Dirt Road Living:
Some Advantages

The "top 10" positives of living on a dirt road:

1) You no longer have the expense of washing your car because there’s no use in trying to keep it clean.

2) In winter, you don’t have a lot of trucks plowing the road and making a lot of noise.

3) There’s no salt and little sand on the road in the winter, so the trees stay healthy, thus enhancing the neighborhood.

4) In hot and dry weather, the dirt billows from the road when a vehicle passes by. It looks so much like a sand storm, you get the experience of a trip to an African desert without the travel expense.

5) Also in hot, dry weather: the windows facing the road are so dirty that you don’t need drapes. You can really save a lot of money this way.

6) You can create refreshing drinks on hot summer days. Throw one scoop of ice cream (the flavor of your choice) and 2 cups of milk against the front of your house and create an instant Mudslide.

7) Because the mailbox sits at the edge of the dirt road, and someone was so thoughtful as to rip the cover off from it, I can now read "dirty mail" without a guilty conscience. It’s legal.

8) The ruts get so deep that you no longer have to steer your vehicle. Just press the accelerator and your vehicle stays in the rut and automatically steers you. This keeps your hands free, allowing you to balance your checkbook, apply mascara, or anything else you might need to do during this "hands free" time.

9) You get the thrills of riding on a roller coaster and not having to wait in line for a ticket.

10) You can plant trees in the big potholes, which can be decorated at Christmas time, giving off a neighborly spirit of peace and joy.

Debbie Berry

Randolph

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